


Stream Crossing

by saekokato



Series: Wild Times and Glitter [2]
Category: Bandom: The Academy Is..., Jonas Brothers
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2010-03-23
Updated: 2010-03-23
Packaged: 2017-10-11 20:28:49
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,220
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/116768
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/saekokato/pseuds/saekokato
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>"It's three-thirty-six, Mike, and I woke up to go to the bathroom, and I'm a girl!"</p>
            </blockquote>





	Stream Crossing

"What do you mean 'girl'?" Mike asks. He squints awkwardly at the digital clock in the main bunk area (Tony had gotten sick of listening to them complain that they never knew what time or date it was, so he'd bought a high tech satellite clock that'd update automatically whenever they crossed time zones). The numbers are blurring somewhere between three and four and it is way too fucking early for the whole Jonas prank war thing.

"It's three-thirty-six, Mike, and I woke up to go to the bathroom, and I'm a girl!" Kevin whisper-shouts. Mike isn't exactly sure why Kevin feels the need – The Jonas Brothers rate higher end hotels that provide better soundproofing than most recording studios.

"I'll admit that this over share has certain female characteristics…"

"Not being metaphorical, Mike!" Kevin does shout this time. "I have a vagina! And breasts! _My penis has gone missing!_ " By 'missing' Kevin's voice has gone from a hysterical shout to the strangled squeak Mike recognizes from when Perez outed the two of them.

"Kid, relax. It'll come back," Mike says around a yawn. "Happens sometimes. We went through a two week stint before we started recording for Santi."

"Fuck you, Carden! This is not the time for fucking jokes!" Kevin snaps. "My. Penis. Is. Missing!"

"Kevin, I'm not joking. It's a phase thing. You'll have to talk to Hurley if you want a detailed explanation of the process; Gerard Way if you want a lecture on gender stereotyping." Mike climbs out of his bunk and heads for the front lounge – he's pretty sure he's going to need coffee for this.

"But. That's _impossible_. People do not just start switching genders," Kevin insists. "Also, I'm currently a _girl_ , Mike. As in, not a _guy_."

Mike shrugs. "You're still you, Jonas. Doesn't really matter to me what parts you happen to have." He nods at Bill as he pours himself some coffee. Bill's been on a writing kick so Mike isn't at all surprised to see him still up. "Trust me, kid. I'm not going anywhere. Even if your dick has gotten temporarily misplaced."

"How are you not freaking out about this?" Kevin demands.

"Told you, it happens. Bill and I were chicks for most of a week; Siska and Butcher, the lucky bastards, only a couple of days." Mike slips into the kitchenette booth across from Bill, who is ignoring Mike's conversation for once. Granted that's only because he's scribbling like a mad scientist into his notebook. "Conrad for almost the full two weeks. Chislett hasn't dealt with it yet, as far as I know."

"Nope, six weeks just after his sixteenth birthday," Bill corrects. He doesn't bother looking up from his notebook.

"Okay, six weeks around a decade ago. I stand corrected," Mike says. "The shortest I've heard of was a couple of hours – Ray Toro – and the longest was six months – Mikey Way."

"I could be like this for six months!" Kevin shrieks.

Mike pulls his phone away from his ear and glares at Bill, who is shaking his head at Mike. "What, Bill?" Mike mutters.

"You're not being very supportive. Young Jonas is not party to the same snafus as you and I," Bill says. He points his pen at Mike. "You need to work on that; being gruff got you the boy. It won't help you keep him."

Mike rolls his eyes. But he puts his phone back to his ear – he plays guitar, he doesn't need both ears for that, really. "Kevin, seriously. Take a deep breath for me."

"Mike!"

"No, Kevin. Stop talking and _breathe_ ," Mike orders. Kevin rumbles something too garbled for Mike to hear, but he takes a deep breath, and then another.

When Mike is certain Kevin is actually going to listen to him and not just hear his voice, he starts again. "It's going to be all right. As fucking weird as this is, it does happen, it has happened and you will live through it, I promise. And it won't be for six months – there were extenuating circumstances involved with Way."

"Right. This happened to you?" Kevin asks. He doesn't sound any calmer but he's listening and not working himself into an anxiety attack. Mike will take it. "What if it's permanent?"

"Everyone I know who's gone through this has switched back," Mike says. "You might be special, kid, but you're not that special."

"There's a first time for everything!" Kevin points out. He's teetering back into the louder, shriller end of his range again. Actually, Mike's pretty sure that Kevin's range has expanded northerly.

"Then we deal with it," Mike says as firmly as he knows how. "I already told you, kid, you aren't getting rid of me."

"Really?" Kevin asks. The question is almost shy; Mike really wants to throttle someone and Kevin's next to youngest brother is at the top of his list.

"Yes, Kevin. Especially over something like this," Mike says. He throws a balled up wad of discarded paper at Bill's head. Fucker should know better than to laugh at other people's private conversations. "You're going to have to work at it to lose me now."

"Oh," Kevin says. Mike can hear the smile taking over Kevin's face. "Okay. So. What do I do now?"

"Well, kid. You have two options. The first is that you wake up the littlests and demand comfort cuddles." Mike cannot believe he just said that.

Bill is obviously having the same problem if the way he mouths 'comfort cuddles' at Mike before Bill stuffs his fist in his mouth to stifle his giggles is any indication. Mike throws a spoon at him this time.

Kevin giggles. "'Comfort cuddles'?"

"I'm sorry, but yes. Comfort cuddles. From your brothers," Mike smiles. "Not the most ideal, I grant you, but they'll have to do until we meet up again."

Kevin's giggles trail off into a sigh. "Two days."

"Actually, one day, one night and part of a morning," Mike corrects. "But who's counting?"

Kevin hums quietly. Mike thinks he recognizes the chord progression from 'Love Bug'. "What's my second option?"

Mike let's his grin curl into a smirking leer – the same one that usually has Kevin shoving him up against walls and devouring his mouth. "You can take the new equipment for a ride."

"Mike!" Both Bill and Kevin exclaim. Granted, Kevin is laughing, and Bill's the one who sounds scandalized – like Mike doesn't know what Bill and Conrad got up to when they'd switched. Neither changes the fact that Mike is being yelled at in stereo now.

He flips Bill off as he stands up. Mike puts his empty mug into the sink as he passes by on his way to his bunk. "No, seriously, kid. I'm willing to lose sleep to help you figure things out. Good causes and all."

Kevin hums again. This one Mike knows means that Kevin is stretching out across his bed. "I think I might like option two."

"Orgasms are always a helpful way to relax," Mike agrees. He sheds his t-shirt and boxers before stretching out in his bunk.

"So, you'll help me 'test drive' right now," Kevin says. "And in two days? If I'm still like this?"

Mike leers at his bunk ceiling. "Oh, either way, we're taking you out for a spin."


End file.
